Existence of Aliens

One of the biggest unanswered questions is if we are alone in the universe. Is life bound to our planet, as an extreme coincidence that hasn’t happened anywhere else, or have we just not been looking hard enough? Life may look different on other planets, very different. The cells we are all too used to may be replaced by elongated bodies of liquid catalysts, or whatever. Standard senses may not exist in ways we expect. Whatever it is, if it’s out there, we want to find it, it’s human nature.


The WOW Signal

On August 15, 1977, the Big Ear radio telescope picked up a certain unexplained signal. The unexplained intensity compelled the astronomer, Jerry R. Ehman, to write “Wow!” and circle the readout in red pen on the printed transcript. The source of the signal came from the constellation of Sagittarius and was assumed not to be the result of a malfunction.

There are many hypotheses including certain comets, terrestrial signals reflected off of space debris, etc. but both have untied ends. For example, why couldn’t other telescopes pick up on those comets, and how could a randomly floating space object reflect a signal from the same source to the same destination for 72 whole seconds? This leads us to what some call the most reasonable explanation: It was artificial. There are aliens doing what we’re doing now, screaming at the top of our lungs with radio signals at promising spots in the galaxy.


Fermi Paradox

One human is about one cubic meter in volume. The number of possible combinations that you can arrange quantum (really small, really really small, really really really small) particles within a cubic meter is about 101070. That means a universe that is the cube root of 101070 (no calculator could solve for that number, sorry), you would expect to see an exact copy of yourself somewhere within that universe.

Now scale that down to find the probability of any type of life (not just an exact copy of you) and the size constraints fit within the visible universe. So where are they?


Drake Equation

The Drake equation predicts the most likely number of active, communicative extraterrestrial civilizations in our galaxy.

N=R_{\ast }\cdot f_{p}\cdot n_{e}\cdot f_{\ell }\cdot f_{i}\cdot f_{c}\cdot L

However, we cannot be certain of all the variables so here’s a more accurate version:

Improved Drake Equation
But seriously, there’s loads of intelligent life. It’s just not screaming constantly in all directions on the handful of frequencies we search.



Life of Fire

To identify something as a living thing, it has to meet a certain set of requirements. An organism must react to its environment, grow, reproduce, maintain homeostasis, use energy, be organized and be made of cells. Everything from a bacterium to a bird meets these requirements (side note: viruses don’t meet these). Although fire isn’t considered alive, why not? It meets all of the above.


Elements of Life

Reaction to Environment

If wind blows on fire, it is capable of pulling reserve heat from its depths to assist the flames. It can also do this in a cold environment or any other conditions.


Everyone knows fire grows. As it develops, it can burn more fuel and has a larger mass.


Fire reproduces in a way similar to binary fission. Part of it splits from the main mass, sometimes assisted and becomes an infant fire.


Very similar to the first element, fire can keep a stable temperature. Lack of heat can be compensated for. Even if it burns too hot, heat is released into the environment.

Energy Use

Fire uses the chemical energy stored in its fuel. What else is there to say?


There are some simple parts of a fire including upper flame, lower flame, fuel, heat reserves, event horizon, singularity and Guy Fawkes.


Remember when I said fuel (multiple times). Ha ha JK. I ment firewood! Wood is made from cells.


Fire Ants

No Reason, Just Ants

Fire Ants
Here in the entomology department, we have a simple two-step formula for answering any question: (1) ants are cool, and (2) we forgot the question because we were thinking about ants.


Thesis Defense

Thesis Defence

Fires just naturally stay burning in wind and cold environments

Yes it does. It sure does (you just supported MY argument!).

Fire doesn’t grow, it just gets bigger

First of all, that’s what growing means. Secondly, fire doesn’t start with the lower flame, heat reserves, event horizon, singularity nor Guy Fawkes.

Fire isn’t reproducing, it’s just splitting

Tell that to my pet salmonella, who reproduces via binary fission. He’ll be sad:


Everything just evens out. That isn’t homeostasis

Homeostasis is life way of keeping things in order. It since evening out is slang for negative feedback, the system is maintaining homeostasis.

Energy use means eats food

No it doesn’t.

Fire doesn’t actually have levels of organization

It does, fire isn’t just a blob. It has *inhale* upper flame, lower flame, fuel, heat reserves, event horizon, singularity and Guy Fawkes.

The cells don’t count because they’re the tree’s cells

If you eat a cucumber, is the material from that cucumber not now part of you. In that case, do you even exist, because all of your body mass came from somewhere.

Ants aren’t cool



Leave your counterarguments in the comments, or Guy Fawkes will get you in your sleep. . .